This is my recap and reaction to one of my must-see Sister Wives episodes, Season 5 Episode 2. A classic episode where Robin misses Logan’s graduation, and this was a huge deal because Logan was the first of the Brown kids to graduate. It was a super milestone for them, and Janelle was obviously pissed and disappointed for other reasons, but let’s get into it.
The episode starts on a serious note with Cody saying that Christine, Mariah, and Robin grew up living the secretive life and that it was normal for the dads to not publicly acknowledge their kids whatsoever. And this is all a prelude to the Browns going to a parent-teacher conference at their kids’ local high school altogether, which in their mind is like the ultimate “here we are” move. They are still, at this point, living in separate homes in Vegas, not in the cul-de-sac yet.
The first teacher they go see is Mariah’s, now Leon, but at this point, their name was Mariah. We see this clip of how they wanted to be a doctor and how they can’t wait to have Sister Wives. And in this episode, many of the older kids talk about what they want to do with their lives, and it’s interesting to see just how super different things really played out. Spoiler alert: Mariah and/or Leon did not become a doctor and most definitely did not get Sister Wives.
Next up is Aspen’s gym teacher, Miss Aaliyah. Aspen says that she does want to be a polygamist later on, and she gets called out by her teacher for missing classes and admits sometimes she just really doesn’t want to go. And now Christine says if Aspen wasn’t getting good grades, she wouldn’t let her miss school. She says, “I wouldn’t let Peyton miss school if he’s not keeping his grades up.” So way to throw Peyton right under the bus for no reason here. And Mary says, “Yeah, but then Mariah says they don’t want to go to school,” and I’m like, “No, it’s school. It’s your education. You have to be there.” I’m not Christine, and Christine did not like that comment at all. She made this face.
We also learn, on a side note, that Logan, the oldest, is swearing a lot now, something he picked up in Vegas, and he’s fully defending himself doing so. He said it caught on to him pretty quickly. Whatever, Logan’s still the perfect child in my eyes. Maddie says that she wants to do hair when she grows up, and Hunter said that he wanted to be a football coach or trainer. He ended up becoming a nurse, and Maddie has an online business.
Meanwhile, at this time, time wanted to be a fashion designer, and they met with Mel’s teacher in this episode. They didn’t meet with any of, I guess, Robin’s—I don’t know how old her kids were—but anyways, none of her kids were profiled at all.
And now we cut to Mary talking about her wet bar. Okay, you’ll remember that this is just epic Sister Wives when they were building the houses in the cul-de-sac in Vegas. Mary, for some reason, was obsessed with having a wet bar in her house. Not for the bar part, but she said for counter space and entertaining. But the thing is, to have the wet bar, she also had to have a hobby room and a pantry and a fifth bedroom, which made her house super expensive. But Mary just loved the wet bar. She just could not let it go.
And Janelle was mad that Mary wanted to have all that because she only has one child. And Janelle admitted that when they first thought about the homes, they thought Mary should have a smaller house. And Janelle was worried that if they did things equal, that she and her six kids would not be getting something they needed or something. This is not a new conflict in the family. It comes up all the time, usually with Mary.
Mary ended up crying, saying that if she had it her way, she would have had eight kids, so why should she be penalized? Which, I actually—I understand. I mean, it’s uh, but when finances are tight, I mean, it’s a difficult discussion. They meet with the builders, and they confirm that Mary can’t just randomly have a wet bar. It’s a wet bar crisis. Ends up, Mary will have a more expensive house. She’s stressed about it and says she’s been in tears over it.
Now, in my opinion, the main event of the episode: Logan’s graduation from high school. And it’s taking place at UNLV. As Logan says he’s walking down the first aisle of his life, Janelle says that they just came back from a road trip, and there’s drama because Cody did not let everyone know the exact timing about when and where to be.
Robin says that she had talked to Janelle the day before asking for the details, and Janelle said, “Oh, it’s like 5 hours.” So Robin, because she had a baby, Solomon, and she didn’t want to, I guess, get a babysitter, she decided to plan to show up late with Solomon so that he wouldn’t be fussing for hours—a plan that went terribly wrong and goes down in Sister Wives history. Robin figured, “Oh, I’ll have a long time before Logan crosses the stage.” But Robin, Logan’s last name is Brown. It’s in alphabetical order. In what world is he not going to be in the first group? I mean, her logic is not working here.
They have to leave in 15 minutes, and Hunter still didn’t shower, and it’s mayhem. Everyone’s arriving at the venue minus Robin, who went back to get a camera or something. And there’s this cute moment where Christine says she used to claim Logan as her own when he was a baby in public and that she really helped raise him. And this is true, and Christine deserves a lot of credit for the child-rearing.
Tension in the stands rise, and Cody’s starting to worry about—you know who else? Robin, of course. And even Mary, in this moment, tells him to calm down because he needs to be here for Logan. Robin claims that she was late, but she also couldn’t find the auditorium, and she was stopping students in desperation to ask for directions. Christine scolds her and says in the confessional, “This was really, really important,” and that, you know, no one had any idea she was trying to be late.
In a controversial move, Cody storms out of the arena to try to find Robin right before Logan takes the stage. And Christine, Janelle, are just blowing up his phone to get him back. Cody gets back just in time to see it, but poor Janelle was messing with her phone or something to take a picture, and she, for some reason, missed it and didn’t hear his name called. And Madison turns around and says, “You missed it, Mom,” and Janelle just yells, “Shut up!” She’s visibly upset. She’s crying. It’s a mess.
